What is it about doing things you’re not supposed to do that causes so much pleasure? I was such a risk taker in my younger years. It’s amazing that I’m still alive or never went to jail…well, except for that one time…
What I mean is, considering all the crazy crap I did, I was very lucky. There’d been a time when I’d take just about any dare, try anything—at least once—and go into the wrong-headed endeavor without fear.
I don’t live that way anymore.
Age takes away some of that fearlessness I guess. You understand too well the potential consequences and maybe your lust for life is more about staying alive than it is about taking crazy chances. The thrill of just barely evading death or worse, isn’t something I’m seeking for the hell of it anymore
By comparison, the thing I did that I wasn’t supposed to do, doesn’t compare to the chances I took in my past. Still, I know I’m supposed to plan these things and I didn’t. I know I’m supposed to do all kinds of promotion beforehand and set a date and all kinds of other crap. More stuff I didn’t do.
The thing I wasn’t supposed to do was make one of my erotica novellas free without warning. I thought about it for a second and just did it. I’m not sorry. It’s been fun to watch it march up the free boards and know that folks are enjoying it.
It felt so good to do that one thing, I’m going to do another thing I’m not supposed to do. I’m going to get rid of the pen name I’ve been using –Louise Kokesh. I like the name. Kokesh was my mom’s maiden name and I used it in memory of her, but I’ve decided to get rid of it. I’m going to publish every genre I feel like writing under the same name I always use. Readers are smart enough to figure out what they want to read and what isn’t for them. The name I use shouldn’t make any difference.
So, a couple of things you’re not supposed to do, but I’m going to do them anyway. What the heck. You only live once.